A word from the ruler....

Well hello all our subbie little boys (and dominate girls), it is the dominate woman you been reading about these past few months; Miss Beth. We appreciate you following us so far as we share our journey, it has been most joyous. I am making this post for several reasons. First, I have decided to add myself to Matt's blog (or you all known him as "Mr. Beth" ) and chime in when the mood strikes me. Second, I wanted to let you know that Matt is finally feeling much better. He really does appreciate all the concern and support. Third and I am sure you were wondering, he is not in trouble and no; I am not shutting down the blog LOL! I am however making him make up for some "lost time" with me therefore Matthew's committment to the following has expanded greatly: Serving/Worshipping/Playing. As a result, he doesn't have much free time so his postings on this blog will be less frequent for the time being. I am sorry for those who are disappointed but I come first. Then again, I always come first LOL! Cheer up though. I will be posting on here a bit and Matthew will be go back to his regular postings soon. In the meantime, I am going to post a few pictures on some stuff that he and I have done since his return to full time submissive husband duty.

What a goregous picture! I actually caught Matthew looking at it a few weeks ago. He keeps telling me how much he hates being turned into "Mattie" but deep down, I think he loves it too just like he does with the strapon. I never thought about this position with him but the stiletto heel to his balls while I give him a painful handjob is just devine. And I love watching him scream and moan with a mixture of pure pleasure and pain. Oh and yes, Mattie does look quite lovely, he really is a beautiful man LOL!

Awwwwwwwwww, poor little Matt he tries so hard when we have one of our sparring sessions but it always end the same way. His defeat at my hands. Matthew's wind and strength are obviously not up to the far after being sick so I taken it "easy" on him a bit; even given him a few moments of hope. But those are going away too. He does take such a beating well, never complaining. Matthew's desire to please me really has no bounds even if I gotten addicted to choking him out. I don't know what it is but the feeling of this goregous man going limp in my body is downright organismic. Oh and yes, he does wear a mouthpiece while I don't. I have no absolutely no reason too. *Evil Smile*

I believe this one is self explainatory though I must say, I been pegging Matt even more then usual lately. His ass and asshole must sting when he sits now, LOL! A word of advice to all you men out there. Everyone of you should be pegged at least once by a woman. I can't guarantee you will enjoy it, Matthew does not enjoy all of it. But you experience it once and know what it feels like especially the loss of whatever power you might feel as a man to a superior woman.
That is all for now, thank you and I will write more again in the future. *Kisses*

Note: And yes little subbie gentlemen, you may wank yourselves off like a gorilla in a zoo as long as your not taken by someone else. :)

Our First Date....

So it was all set. Our very first date. I remember running around like an idiot the day before trying to set everything up. I made sure my car was clean, had plenty of cash in my wallet and agonized on what resturant we should have lunch at. I talked with Miss Di and pleaded for help. She wasn't buying it...at least my first pleas:

Miss Diana: "Oh no loverboy, you are on your own for this one. I cannot interfer and give you all kinds of help. That wouldn't be fair to B....or yourself".
I told Her I understood but kept asking was there anything She could tell me. Even if it's something really simple. Di and I were walking around the track at the gym when this discussion took place. After awhile, She finally relented a bit:
Miss Diana: "I think your a good guy Matt and have my B's best intentions in mind. So I will help you....but in only one area! Clothes.
I look at Miss Di with a bit of confusion. How were clothes going to help me? Then it dawn on me
She was going to help me with what to wear. Stupid! LOL!

Miss Diana: "You need to wear something very nice tomorrow Matt. Don't expect that a pair of jeans and a polo will be acceptable to her. And whatever you do, don't wear shorts with B. Not on a first date even if it's really hot. You need to show her that your really committed to putting your best foot forward at all times with her. If not, kiss whatever chance you have with her goodbye. And it's just not your clothes. Make sure you are shaven, your shoes are very well shined and wearing your best watch".

I listen very carefully to Her instructions before asking if a shirt and a tie would be appropriate?
Miss Diana: "No, that more then likely would be overkill considering it's just a lunch date. Just make sure it is something really nice, but not pink. She hates pink on a guy, LOL! Then there is Beth and what She wears. That is an entirely different issue, LOL!"
That information to be very helpful. I was planning on wearing a nice polo and jeans, LOL! I thought it was nice enough to let Miss Beth know I was serious about Her but luckily, I found it wasn't and pick something else out. Miss Di went on to explain the three possible type of outfits Miss Beth could possibly have on..and what they mean:

(Jeans/Gym Shoes) Miss Diana: "If She comes out wearing a pair of jeans and either gym shoes or flat ones; game over Matt. That is B's way of saying that your are a nice guy but you have no chance in hell with anything other then being stuck in as friends. And when you are stuck in the friends category with her, there is no parole son. You're there for good. And do not think just because She looks really good in it doesn't mean you still have a chance. You don't."
Me: "I know. Beth would look good in a paperbag".
Miss Di: "Jeez Matt. Calm down those hormones for a moment will ya, LOL!"
Me: "Sorry Di, you were saying".
Miss Di: "It's okay. It is really sweet how crazy you are about her. But I have to say it again. Jeans and gym shoes equals no chance. It could be her way of signaling what your fear was earlier. That it's a sympathy date and this will be your one and only date with her.
Me: "Well at least I will know from the very start whether She is interested or not LOL!


From there, Miss Di went on:

(Sun dress) Miss Diana: "If Beth is wearing some sort of sundress, that means she could be interested in you but not a lot. Certainly not a lot up to this point. You will have a chance with her if B wears a sundress but it will take a lot of work by you in order to win her over. I am not saying it's impossible, just is difficult. At least it's better then her wearing jeans and only seeing you as a friend no matter what."
Me: "So ultimately, her wearing a sundress is a good thing?"
Miss Di: "It is and I would set my expectation that She wears a sundress. It would fit Her right now since most likely B does not want to jump into anything right now after the whole Alex fuck up".
Me: "Did She tell you that?"
Miss Diana: "I cannot say Matt you know that. But I will say that there is a chance she will wear a possible third option and if B does, that is a really good sign for you".  

Me: "What Di?"


(Nice dress/high heels) Miss Diana: "If Beth shows up in a pretty dress and high heels, then she is interested in you. I cant' tell you how much she is interested in you if she does but I can tell you she only wears a dress and high heels on a first date if she likes the guy."
Me: "How often has she ever wore a nice dress and high heels on a first date?"
Miss Diana: "Not that often Matt. Not often at all. I think you have to go all the way back to Bobby for her to wear that on a first date. I know with Alex she did not wear it".
Me: "Wow! And they dated for several months. So I should temper my expectation not to see high heels and a pretty dress."
Miss Diana: "Yes you should. And don't think just because she wears them doesn't mean your home free either sport. She could easily find reasons to not like you after that. It just means she is interested with you when the date begins. It also means she has very high expectations on how the date should go."
Me. "Really? How high??"
Miss Diana: "Very. Beth doesn't throw on a nice dress and a pair of high heels for a guy unless she expects it to go very well and lead somewhere."

She went on to explain that the lunch nature of our date was meaniless as well. She will wear a nice dress and heels if She likes you even if it's afternoon time.

That night, I had the most difficult time sleeping. I had done everything I could think of. I tried to get as much out of Miss Di as I could and with her suggestions, went out to a store and bought a new shirt to wear to go along with a nice pair of brown pants. I had my nice brown shoes cleaned, my car washed, I cleaned my best watch and even got my hair neck cleaned up. But there was so much that could go wrong and I kept thinking about Miss Beth would wear when She came out. I was hoping it be a pretty dress and heels but being scared shitless it was just going to be jeans and gym shoes which mean zero chance at love. I also kept second guessing the place I pick out for us to eat at. I knew it was one of her favorites and Miss Di had mention in passing once, "That it is her favorite place to go on like a Saturday afternoon and have their quacamole with chips." I remember Her once saying.  But it wasn't a fancy place at all. As a matter of fact, it was really just an upscale sports bar. What if she came out in this goregous dress and heels expecting us to have lunch at an upscale resturant only to take her to a sports bar resturant? Talk about blowing a chance! I wound up making a second reservation at a nice Italian resturant I knew just in case. I also hadn't spoken with Miss Beth either that night other then I did reply an email back. She wanted my phone number (She is always in control; ALWAYS) in case "something unexpected happened". I thought about asking for Hers just in case but I was so pysched about this date, I was going to make it no matter what. Plus, She had not offered my cell phone and I would find out later, I had not earned it quite yet LOL! Eventually, I fell asleep dreaming only of her and what possibly could go right tomorrow....or wrong".


I remember waking up that following morning with a ton of nervous energy even though I did not sleep that great the night before. I thought about going to the gym and workingout but I thought better of it knowing Miss Beth mostly was there either training or working and  I didn't want to see her before our date. I figured it be awkward. So I  went for a quick run before doing some basics like pushups and situps at home. I also had a light breakfast and read the morning paper while trying not to think about Miss Beth. It was very hard not too. I watched some TV for a bit before jumping in the shower and got ready. As I got ready, I watched the weather report and it stated that we should expect scatter thunderstorms and rain this afternoon. "Great", I'd thought.."I just got my frickening car cleaned". I sighed as I heard the weatherman stated it again. A bad omen perhaps? I certainly hope not! I finished getting ready and look over the directions plus myself once again before heading out to pick Miss Beth up. I also grab a large umbrella in case the weatherman was right for once.

The traffic was relatively light which I had expected and I got to Miss Beth's parents house in plenty of time. As a matter of fact, I was ten minutes early as I look at my car clock which read "11:50 AM". What to do? I thought to myself. At first, I made sure I had everything I needed. How embarrasing would it be if I forget something that I didn't check before like breath freshers or worse yet cash. I already check to see if I had my wallet and cell phone before I left the house but not those two items. I checked and had both therefore I didn't have to try and squeeze in a quick run to a gas station. I thought about ringing the bell just to let her know I was there and she should take her time. But then her instructions went off in my head: "Do not ring the bell or knock. Just be there at noon". So I decided to not ring the bell. I got out of my car and went around to lean against the passenger door. I figure it would be easy access for me to open it when She came. The next ten minutes were the longest of my life. It seemed like I lean against my car for an enternity.

Miss Beth walked out precisely at noon. And when She did, my heart began beating out of my chest. I could not believe how beautiful She looked. And as She walk down the steps of Her parents house, I realize something. This was literally the first time I was seeing Miss Beth in an outfit outside of Her gym wear. I never seen Her in anything else since I have only seen Her at the gym and the one time we went to lunch with Miss Di, She had worn Her gym clothes since She needed to head back for work. I felt like I was going to start drooling I was so turn on. It didn't even felt like it was real. It honestly felt like a dream and Miss Beth was walking on a beach somewhere going in slow motion. And that when something else dawn on me. I was so taken on how goregous She looked and how much I wanted Her, I didn't bother to check out what She was wearing which according to Miss Di "would let you know right upfront how much she was interested in you".




I look Her over intentially for a brief instinct to see what type of outfit She had on. Miss Beth was not wearing jeans so at least I wasn't in the friend zone in that way. I also noticed She wasn't wearing a sundress either so I wasn't in that category either. I got exicted as She went down the last step. Was She wearing a pretty dress and high heels? Was I guy She really fancied over? I thought....I don't know. Miss Beth was wearing a dress; that was clear. But it honestly reminded me of a white tennis outfit then a dress (It wasn't, I just struggle with Women's fashion LOL!). It was pretty and She looked goregous in it but I had no clue what it meant! Was my Wife expecting us to go play tennis before or maybe after lunch? I looked down and thought maybe Her shoes would give me a better clue. Again, no idea. They weren't gym shoes or flats so at least I wasn't again, being told no before this date even started. But at the same time, they weren't high heels either. They were someplace in the middle.
A million things were going off in my mind including the following: She was about to reach my car and I hadn't even said hello yet since I was drooling and trying to figure out what Her fucking dress meant! I tried to form the words, "Hello"in my mouth but She beat me to the punch.
Miss Beth: "Hey Matt. Nice to see you. Hope you weren't waiting long.
Me: "Not really. About 10 minutes".
Miss Beth: "Really that long? You should have rung the bell."
Me: "I was going to but you told me not too" (As I opened the car door).
Miss Beth: "Yeah I did, didn't I? You listen well I guess". (Closes the door).
Me: "You have no idea." I'd say underneath my breath as I walk over and got in.
Me: "If I may so, you look goregous today Beth". (starts the car)
Miss Beth: "Why thank you Matt. That is sweet. You look nice yourself. Where we going to eat? I'm starving".
Me: "It's a suprise"
Miss Beth: "Okay but it better be a good suprised, nobody likes a bad suprise!"
We both laugh as She said it. We talked throughout the car ride over to the resturant though Miss Beth asked if I could put some music on at one point, "for background noise". I thumb through some stations but eventually She said, "Don't you have any music that more fits a first date?" She asked. I smiled and push CD Number 2 on my car radio. A moment later, "I've Got A World On A String" began playing by Frank Siantra. She laughed. My heart sank for about the 100th time already with this Woman and we were barely 10 minutes into our first date. I had to say something to try and salvage the moment. I didn't want to blush in embarrasement again of Her thinking Frank Sinatra was for "Old Farts Or Something".

Me: "Sorry, I didn't know you did not like Frank Sinatra".
Miss Beth: "No, I love Sinatra! It's just isn't Frank normally saved for when a guy is trying to make a move on a girl sexually?"
Me: *BIG GULP "True but we did say this date was not us going out as friends. If I put on something else now, we be implying that perhaps we just want to be friends. And right now, I don't think either one of us is hoping this date leads to us being friends. At least up until this point".
Miss Beth: "I suppose not".  *Smiles*
Me: "Want me to leave it on?"
Miss Beth: "Please do".
Wow! I had finally went toe-to-toe verbally with Miss Beth and had not gotten the crap kick out of me and left embarrased. As a matter of fact, I think I score a couple points. Go me! But I quickly got off my rush of "power" and worried again. We were coming up to the resturant. What if She didn't want to go there? I had decided against my backup plan and dropped the reservation on the car ride over to pick Her up. I realized the damage would have been done regardless because She would have hated my big idea so it was pointless to have a backup plan. Be cool Matt, I thought to myself. Be cool. And as we drove, the heavens open up and a down pour begin. Terrific I thought to myself, the weathermen are finally right! Bad omen indeed!! At least I remember to pack that large umbrella.

We pulled up to the resturant and thankfully, Miss Beth did not leave me dangling:
Miss Beth: "Oh I was kinda hoping we were going here! I love this place! They got the best guacamole ever! How did you know to take me here?"
Me: "Like you said earlier, I listen well." *Smiles*
Miss Beth: "You listen very well apparently. Unexpected". *Smiles back*
I pulled the car to the front of the resturant and got out grabbing my umbrella from the back seat. It was raining cats and dogs and there was a bit of sidewalk before you got under the roof  of the resturant therefore I didn't want Her to get wet. I ran over to Her side, opened the umbrella and then Her door. I reach down for Her hand with my right hand as I held the umbrella with my left. As I open the car door. I notice something I had never seen before; Miss Beth looking suprised.
Miss Beth: "Wow... *She takes my hand and gets underneath the umbrella..again pure magic for me when I take Her hand*.....most unexpected Matthew."
Me: "I didn't want you to catch cold Beth". I'd smile at Her and honestly, I wanted to kiss Her right then and right there. But She beat the crap out of me for trying that move so I'd just walk Her to the door and ran back to my car in order to park it.
Me: "Go in Beth please, no reason to wait in the rain. The reservation is under my name".
Miss Beth: "I don't mind waiting Matt. I'll be here when you get back."

I slam the door to my car after I closed my umbrella, got all tingly and parked the car. I then went to the front where Miss Beth was still at waiting for me underneath the overhead. I escorted Her in, we got our table and had an absolute fabulous lunch. We had their guacamole and chips as an appitizier and it was just how Miss Beth had describe it; the best. We laughed a lot and it seemed like our conversasion was endless. No awkward pauses. I had been worried that we would have nothing to say to each other but the opposite was happening. We had too much to talk about. We also flirted quite a bit or well, at least I tried to flirt with Her. I also noticed She'd laughed whenever I made a joke or tried to be funny which I took as a good sign. We had lunch, a few beers too (God did She turn me on when order a beer) split a dessert and even had tea. Everything was perfect except I still didn't knew what Her outfit meant. I even called Miss Di quickly when Miss Beth went to the bathroom at one point. I told Her about it but She wasn't giving me any help: "I don't have a clue loverboy. You are on your own now remember, LOL!" While we were having tea, I looked at my watch. Holy smokes it was nearly 3:00 PM. That means we had been at the resturant for over 2 hours and a half hours now. I mentioned to Miss Beth how late it had gotten and She had the same reaction.
Me: "What is it you wish to do now?"
Miss Beth: "What do you mean?"
Me: "Well when you agreed to our date, you said after lunch you would see what you felt like doing".
Miss Beth "Is this your attempt to continue our date?"
Me: "No, that wasn't part of our agreement. I am just asking what you felt like doing".
Miss Beth: *Smiles* "You know. You should have been a lawyer and not a architect Matthew. You know that right?"
Me: "My mother has always told me that".
Miss Beth: "She is a smart lady".
Me: "Aren't all women?"
Miss Beth: "Careful now Matt. You don't want to kiss up that much to me. But you are right. And I should answer your question. Well, I don't feel like going home just yet. Do you?"
Me: "Not in the slightest".
Miss Beth: "Did you take care of the bill?"
Me: "Yes and no, you can't give any money for it".
Miss Beth: "We will see about that later. But right now, I am in the mood to catch a late maintee movie. What about you?"
Me: "I'd be game".
Miss Beth: "Good I saw a newspaper on the bar. Let's go checkout some movie times"
Miss Beth grabbed me by the hand and dragged me over to the bar. I nearly crapped my pants I was so turn on. She opened the newspaper and we thumbed through our picks. There was crap out. The big movies that weekend were "Talladega Nights" and "Snakes On A Plane". Terrific. Neither movie was something you wanted to be your first date. Will Ferrell doing NASCAR jokes and Samuel J Jackson stuck on a plane with snakes. Neither one worked in my mind. I thumbed through it some more and noticed that "The Devil Wears Prada" was playing in a bit and we could make it. I figure that was better then the other choices. I also notice just before I spoke, She jumped ever so slightly.
Me: "The Devil Wears Prada" is starting in about twenty minutes. We can go see perhaps I'd said.
Miss Beth: "You really want to see "The Devil Wears Prada?"
Me: "Why did you see it?"
Miss Beth: "I'd asked you first".
Me: "Kinda. It does have Anne Hathaway in it. And she is a talented actress and pretty."
Miss Beth: "She is goregous I have to admit that. So you wish to watch Miss Anne Hathaway for the rest of the afternoon?."
Me: "No. I rather watch you all afternoon but I'll settle for Anne Hathaway if you want to see it".
Miss Beth: *Laughs*. "Oh dear me Matt. Where on earth did you come from?"
Me: "I am one of a kind".
Miss Beth: "LOL! Fair enough."
Me: "Then it's settle then. "The Devil Wears Prada in 20 minutes".
Miss Beth: "Nope, let's go see "Snakes On A Plane. It will be fun."
And off we went.



We went to the movie and had a blast. She bought our tickets but I insisted I buy our two bottles of water and a small popcorn that we split. I guess we were both full from lunch because we didn't even finish the small bag. The movie was dumber then shit but we laughed throughout the entire thing, cracking jokes. The theater was mostly empty so we didn't bother anyone and She put up Her feet on the chair in front of us and had me do the same. Sometime in the middle, I reached for Her hand but stumbled as I did so. It didn't matter though because She was already reaching for mine and wasn't fumbling. Our hands connected and we both gave each other a look and a smile. We were like a couple of teenagers and I was in heaven. It was going better then I ever expected. We held hands on the way to the car after the movie and of course, I opened the door for Her like I did all day long.

I drove Her home and we started the ride by laughint and talking. It had been a fun day; a great date really. The best date of my life I thought to myself as we got close to Her house. But something strange happened as we got close to Her house, She began shutting down. Miss Beth really stop talking other then answering a question I had or something. For the first time all day we were having awkward silences. Maybe I had been too bold in holding Her hand. Or maybe it was while it was a fun date, that's all it was. We pulled our to Her driveway and I was very nervous. I'd thought something was wrong but I tried to press on:
Me: "May I walk you to the front door, make sure you get in all right".
Miss Beth: *Looking straight ahead* "No".
Me: "I had a wonderful time with you Beth. I hope we can -------"
And that is when it happened. Before I could even blink, Miss Beth had grabbed me by the collar, pull me towards Her and began kissing my lips. I was honestly in a state of pure shock for a moment and thought I wasn't kissing back at all so I made sure to quickly get into it. Her lips? Pure heaven. Her tongue? Pure heaven. Everything about Her was pure heaven including our She kissed which was perfect. I also notice She was in completely control of our kiss but I could care less. My head was tilted in a way Miss Beth could massage my face and grab my neck which She was doing and the only one of us to make a "mmmmmmmmmm" sound was me. We kissed like that for quite a bit. It was honestly the best kiss of my life and did not want to end but like everything else, it had to end. My head was spinning when we finished. We just look at each other for a few moments after we finished. Miss Beth was giggling very quietly so I'd knew She at least sort of like it. I then spoke something stupid but I guess sweet:
Me: "Anne Hathway has gotten nothing on you Beth *catching my breath*. Nothing".
Miss Beth: *Smiles* "I am glad you feel that way."
Me: *Trying to act cool* "I had a great time B, I hope we can see each other soon".
Miss Beth: "I had a wonderful time too Matt. Give me your cell phone please".
I grabbed my cell phone and quickly handled it to Her. She programmed Her number into my phone and handled it back to me".
Miss Beth: "Call me at 9 PM sharp tomorrow night. Got it?"
Me: "Got it! Goodnight! Sure I cannot walk to your door or at least open the car door".
This is where it got strange..at least for a moment. Miss Beth was about to get out of the car and has I am saying my goodbye, She is reapplying Her lipstick. Weird I'd thought. Why should be putting more lipstick now that She was home? Maybe Miss Beth's parents where home and didn't want them to see She just sat in their driveway for the past few moments and was smooching with him. I would find out that thought was completely wrong.

Miss Beth: "No I got Matt it. Thank you again for a wonderful time...*about to open the car door but stops*. "Oh Matt. One last thing."
Me: "What is it?"
Miss Beth: "Do you carry a handkerchief?"
Me: "Yeah I do. Why?"
Miss Beth:*Smiling* "I thought so. Can I see it?"
Me: "Sure I'd guess." *I reached into my back pocket and grab my handkerchief. I then handled it to Her.
Miss Beth: *She looks down at it for a good moment smiling. She then puckers Her lips and gives it a good long kiss leaving Her lip marks on it since she puckered them. She then hands it back to me giggling again ever so slightly. She then looks deep into my eyes. "Miss me Matt, okay?"
Me: "Honestly, I already miss you. Will you miss me?"
Miss Beth: "I will think about it" *smiles and winks opens the door and leaves walking slowly back to Her house. She looked back as She gets to Her door and smiled. I watch in awe and smile back. When She got in, I drove off..for about a block. Then I stopped the car and exhaled so deeply and just shook. My God, I cannot believe that just all happened. I look down at the handkerchief and notice my cock was rock hard. Wow. I don't even think two cold showers is going to take care of that! I did call Her right at 9 PM the following night and we stay up to nearly 3 AM the last morning talking. Among our topics that night...our second date.

Coming up next: Our second date.

Appendix: Miss Beth would like to use a moment and use the "50 Shades Of Grey" style of writting so the Dom could give a few thoughts after I wrote what happened:
1. Her first impression of me after She'd walkout: "I thought he looked so damn hot. Part of me wanted to throw him on the car and just start kissing him right then and there. He was so put together and yet he did not go overboard with his outfit by wearing some ridicilously priced shirt. I also noticed he was a bit tongue tied when I walk down the stairs so I spoke first. It was really cute. I also liked how he was waiting to open the car door for me. Made me feel like a special young lady from the very first moment."
2. Frank in the car: "I like how he sparred with me. He didn't back down to whatever I said. He challenged me at the right time but had been respectful about it. I liked it. It showed he had a backbone even if I wanted him to be a submissive man. Plus I got to bring up sex first with him and make him squirm for a few moments. I loved it when he squirms!"  
3. Getting the umbrella for Her and walking Her to the door of the resturant: "Like I said at that very moment...very unexpected. Matt seemed to be a gentleman so I'd knew he do something for me and not have me walk in the pouring rain. I expected him to just drop me off in front but if we parked and he just carried an umbrella in the rain, that be okay too but a bit disappointing. The fact he not only dropped me off but got out and walk me to the door with an umbrella was extremely unexpected and honestly made me a bit hot. When I stood up and was walking with him, I was unopposed to him kissing me at that point. I wanted to kiss him first and felt like the moment wasn't right for that yet but if he went ahead and kiss me then, I wasn't going to get that upset".
4. Jumping at the bar while we look at the newspaper: "I was trying to be all cutsy with him and rub the heel of my foot on his leg. I know I was putting him through a lot of tests and could be really rough on him so I wanted to have a moment where I wanted to let him know that I really did like him and yes, was a bit smitten with him as well. The dumbass though moved his leg just as I was about to touch his so it startled me ever so slightly. The dumbass also failed to notice I wasn't really looking at the movie times. I knew I wanted to go see "Snakes On A Plane" even though it was a horrible movie. But that was the whole point. If you could have a good time with someone while watching a terrible movie, you have someone. So I didn't look at the paper really. I'd just look at him and smiled".
5. Not wanting me to pay for everything: "I didn't want to think I was some sort of free loader and just interested in him because he was pretty successful and I was just out of college. Besides, if we wind up together; I be controlling his money at anyrate so what is the difference, LOL!"
6. What the white dress meant: "As Matt said, he doesn't have a good understanding but I can see how it could remind him of a white tennis dress. It had kinda a similiar cut. Why did I wear it? I wore it because I bought the dress the day we meet a few months ago and thought it would be really cute if I were to ever went out with him for some reason. Turns out it was a smart purchase. And yes, the dress and mid heels meant I was interested in him. Very very interested in him. :)
7. The handkerchief kiss: "Just pulling him stronger into my web. I knew he was really into me but just in case he forget for a moment or didn't realize I was really into him, he remember".
8. Why She didn't let me walk Her to the door: "I already planned on how I was going to say goodnight and we didn't have to leave his car. Plus, I still had plenty of tests for him and wanted him to continue chasing. Besides, my parents were not home and weren't going to be home so if we walked to the door, I be tempted to ask him in. And if I asked him, then I don't know if I could control myself with him especially since I didn't have any ducktape handy. *Smiles*

The Persuit of Miss Beth....

So now you know about Miss Beth and I before we meet and what were the circumstances where when we did. I wish I could tell you She dumped Alex immediately and started up with me but She didn't. Our first date would not happen for a few months. Sure, She and I would talk at the gym but I also did that with Miss Diana, who of course I was trying to win approval of. The only time I'd saw Miss Beth out of the gym was when the three of us went to lunch after a particularly grueling spin class. Looking back on it, we were very flirting when we went out to lunch that Saturday but we both denied it for a long time. And that is how it stayed for nearly a month. That is until a faithful hot sticky night where Miss Beth's life was forever changed and therefore mine:

"Alex invited me to a buddy of his house to watch a movie. He had a small movie theater in it and was going to show a double feature with some other friends. I wasn't particularly fond of his friend but many of our mutual friends were going to be there including Di, so I went. It was a goregous house with a nice home theater. Everything went fine during the first movie. But everything changed in the second movie. We were in the middle of "Star Wars: Revenge Of The Sith". I had pushed my legs doing squats that day and was beginning to cramp up due to sitting for so long. Therefore I got up and stood in the back. Alex eventually got up and stood behind me. And that is where it happened. Alex had been drinking and perhaps he wanted to show off his beer muscles to his friends who teased him all the time that I could kick his ass. I also think the fact that I made him a semi-cuckold due to my really indifference to him sexually had finally gotten to him."


"He reached around and squeezed my breasts yelling, "Hey boys, look at the pair I get to play with!". He also made a "honk honk" noise has he did it. I was enraged but also mortified at the same time. It went on only for a few seconds but it was  few seconds too long. I got out of his hold, cursing at him as I did so. I turned to him and saw his stupid ass face smiling at me while his friends cheered and laughed. My rage at this point was uncontrollable so I decked the SOB hard. Really hard. I gave him a right cross that he never saw. *BAM*. Alex moaned as my fist went flying through him and he crumbled to the ground. He hit the ground really hard and before I knew it, he was out cold completely. There was a huge "OHHHHHHHHHHH" in the room and then dead silence for a moment as I stood over the KO'ed Alex. Then a bitch by the name of Stacey rushed to Alex's defense (She was all about his nuts which She eventually got). She immediately checked on Alex and massaged his head. Then she started to curse me out. I was no mood to be cursed at and considering I'd just KO'ed a grown ass man with one shot, this little chicken slut really stood no chance therefore Di and a few other guys rushed between us. Stacey also came to her senses once she saw the rage in my face. Everyone stared at me with a bit of horror, disbelief and awe. I was raging mad and honestly wanted to beat the shit out of him some more even though he was out cold. Di thankfully was there and told me just to "Take off hun now! I'll handle this". I didn't want to leave at first but I eventually calm myeslf enough to take in Diana's words and agreed. I told her I'd call her tomorrow and left in hurry but not before giving everyone one last cold look to let them know just how mad I was".

"I got in my car and drove like a wild woman for awhile before realizing I was going to hurt someone possibly if I  continued this way so I pulled into a 7-11, got a coffee and sat in the parking lot for awhile where I did something that I hardly ever do. I cried. I wasn't upset that I had punched out my now ex-boyfriend, actually I was rather relieved and wished I had dumped him months ago. I wasn't upset that some dumb slut had rushed to his defense either. She liked him and therefore could have him. And I wasn't even upset that nobody outside of Diana really checked one me after being groped in public without permission. No. Instead, I was rather upset that I acted like a stupid little girl and gotten into a relationship that deep down I did not want. I was a woman meant to be in control and yet I didn't seize it with this man who did not even deserve me? How had this happened? I was a woman who was able to use men my entire life. I was only twenty-two years old but I already men declaring their devotion to me in all kinds of forms. House slaves, submssives slaves, homework slaves, sugar daddies, etc. Yet in my own relationship,  I had it played  it "vanilla". I was miserable the entire time and didn't even know it.


I decided in that parking lot that whoever I dated next, they had to play by my rules and under my authority. And it had to happen right from the get go. I know other relationships have worked where it evolves into a female-led relationship. But for me it had not work and I strongly believed it never was. I knew what it meant too. It meant just like Matt has told me, it meant coming to grips with the thought of being alone for the rest of my life. It's ironic that we both had a break through moment where we realized what we wanted and were willing to risk being alone forever in order to possibly achieve it. And what I needed was simple. I needed a man who was strong enough to submit. I just didn't want some wimpy guy who rolled over always or was just into kink play. I needed a strong successful man who could keep up with me but ultimately knew his place which were on his knees in front of his Goddess. I made me a vow that night to never settle again or even consider suspending my superiority for the sake of a relationship. Thankfully, I didn't have to look very far to find Mr. Right and in some ways, I knew Matt was it. I just needed some time and get over what had happened."

I wasn't at the movie party  but the news of what happened went around the gym the following day like wildfire. Miss Beth had just punchout Her boyfriend and was now single. It was the talk of the club that day and it seemed like everyone was in on the secret. I tried to not pay attention but deep down, I was giddy. I'd definitely was going to ask Her out. I was already crazy about the young Woman. But I decided to make a tactful chance. I wasn't going to ask Miss Beth out right away. For one, She just had a dramatic experience and had broken up with a guy in the most dramatic fashion possible. I believed She'd needed some time to Herself; which She has told me since She did. Second, guys were going to come out of the woodworks to ask Her out. I would be unable to distinguish myself from the crowd. But mostly, I wanted to win the approval of Her BFF, Miss Di. I had a gut feeling after spending some time with them, Miss Diana's opinion matters most to my Wife. My intutition turned out to be correct. Miss Diana's seal in the end proved to be extremely valuable. Therefore, I spent the next several weeks, talking with Miss Diana and becoming very good friends with Her. I did talk with Miss Beth but only at the club. I never even asked for Her phone number during this time. I watched as guy after guy made his play for Her but go down in flames. Most of the time she was pretty gentle but if they presisted too much, My Wife would become very cruel. But it always ended the same, with the guy's heart cut out from him.

"It was craziness at the gym during that period. Everyone seemed to know the story and were talking about. Guys in particular were going wild over it. I'd seemed to have a new guy asking me out (or two) everyday. Everyone from guys at the gym to ones I known in college and where waiting for me to be single. I'd just wasn't ready to date and more importantly, wasn't really interested in any of them. I needed time for myself so I dove myself into my new career and of course, bodybuilding. Stephanie asked me to do some sessions again in since I had stopped during my last semester of college but I wasn't up for that either. I needed time to myself even though nobody seemed to give it to me. Except Matt. I had been thinking about him and was curious to see if something could happen with him. But I wanted to him to do the chasing which he wasn't doing at all. Rather it seemed like he was doing more chasing after Di then me (We both laughed at this now) so I tried to ignore him. And yet I couldn't. I was too taken with him frankly even though I didn't know him that well. Finally after several weeks, I decided I was ready for him to begin his persuit of me. I just wanted to go over a few things with Di first. I left a note in her mailbox: "Di, My parents are going to be at their cottage this weekend so sleepover at my house. I've been wanting to talk with you about a few things. I already got our wine, just let me know when you will be over. Love ya! B".

Miss Diana came over to Her house and they spent the weekend together going over everything. In particular during a walk, my Wife asked about what was going on with me. She knew I liked Her but was curious to why I was spending all my time with Miss Di and not Her. "Perahps he is building a backup plan", My wife stated which They both laughed at. It was then Miss Diana let my Wife know the following: (Note: I will write Miss Di's words in blue so you can tell the difference).

1. Matt doesn't like you. He is completely smitten with you.
2. Whenever he speaks about you, he gushes and wants to bring you up whenever he can.
3. She caught me getting a hardon at the gym while looking at Miss Beth. They really laughed about that one which included my Wife calling me a "pervert" in a playful way. Miss Di did say though "I'd recovered well'.
4. I stood up for Miss Beth when a few male members where making crude marks behind Her back (They talk about Her like She was some piece of meat). Miss Beth really liked that.
4. He was nervous to ask you out but not scared.
5. He is waiting to ask Miss Beth out for several reasons most notably my approval.


Miss Beth listened as Miss Di filled Her in on everything. Later on, Miss Beth went over about Her new rules for dating. They talked about how submissive I could be. Miss Di thought I definitely had submissive tendancies but how far they went, She wasn't sure. Ultimately, Miss Beth asked what Miss Di what She'd thought:

Miss Diana: "I said it the very first time I saw you two together. I thought you make a nice couple and that thought has not changed since I gotten to know him. He wanted my approval remember? Well he has it. Go for it sista!"
Miss Beth: *Smiles*. "I am. He really doesn't know what he is in for does he? I have a lot of tests he needs to pass first before we even go out! (They both laughed). And if he doesn't pass...
Miss Diana: "Then Matt wasn't good enough for you just like the other bums".
Miss Beth: "I agree. I am going to nudge him a bit in the right direction but other then that, he has to prove his worth.
Miss Diana: "So the chase is on huh?" *Smiling*
Miss Beth: *Smiling back*  "The chase is on. I just need to do something first".


And that something to me is a perfect illustration of what kind of Woman Miss Beth is. That night, She wrote a letter to Alex. Alex had been calling/texting/emailing Her for the past several weeks begging for his forgiveness and "one last chance". My Wife had been ignoring him the entire time but now felt it was right time to finally reply. She stated that he was forgiven for his terrible behavior and despite what had happened during the movie party, My Wife still thought he was a descent guy. That being said, they were done for good and in no way shape of forum was She interested in rekindling a romantic relationship. She then closed by wishing him nothing but the best, that She will not speak ill of him in the future to other people (unless people bring up the one incident) and that if he wish to stay "casual friends". they could provided heunderstood She had no personal perference on the matter therefore he left it up to him (He was the one that had to make all the effort to stay in connected, not Her). She got the note to him through a mutual friend and even though Alex was devstated that he had no chance of winning Miss Beth back, he decided to stay casual friends with Her anyway; which they still are today. I guess he couldn't stay away from the Goddess, LOL! I often asked Miss Beth why She wrote such a compassionate and really gentle letter to him:

"Because it was the right thing to do and more importantly, it was the truth. I did think he was a descent guy despite what had happened and I did forgive him for his groping of me. I like resolution in my life too and if I just ignored him, who knows how long he would have gone on before getting the hint. Plus, it was a symbolic moment for me. It was like I was saying goodbye to whatever silly little girl that was left in me and hello for good to the powerful woman I was always meant to be. And it gave me a clean break to start concentrating on you, LOL!"

I of course was unaware of any of this. Not of Miss Beth's revelation and new found power, not of Miss Diana telling Miss Beth about all that was happening with us (even though I did ask for Miss Di's approval several days before this), not about the note to Alex or Miss Beth's interest and concentration on me, etc. None of it. The only thing I was aware of was when I came to the gym the following Monday, there was a note waiting for me on the member's computer in the gym by Beth (Our gym has a computer system that is used for a whole variety of things including members keeping logs of their workouts, forums on excerise and a email system where trainers can send notes to members for encouragement or if they are a client, information):

Miss Beth: "Matt, what is your email address? I need to speak with you about something and it is personal matter". - B

I nearly fall over when I read it. Miss Beth wanted to speak with me about a "private matter". Holy crap! I was so damn happy though I was a bit confused. Miss Di already had my email address so I was wondering why Miss Beth didn't just asked Her for it? And what did a "personal matter" entail? My brain was spinning at this point but I immediately replied and gave Her my email address. (Note: For those who are wondering, the gym that Miss Beth works out as a very greyish rule when it comes to gym members and workers interacting/dating. It is forbidden for a trainer to date a client but since I wasn't a client it was okay if we did as long as it didn't effect Miss Beth at the workplace or the member. That being said, Miss Beth took a very small risk in asking me for my email address (I had given mine to Miss Diana). It is frowned upon by the club for workers to "initiate" contact with members outside the club. And by using the club's computer, it was possible for someone to see it and if they did, it could have possibly become an issue. It was not a fireable offense at all, just something that doesn't look the best even though Miss Beth was in Her first few months at the club. I have often asked Miss Beth what She would done had She got caught and Her response as always been the same: "Show a bit of leg, pretend I had a "brain fart", act a bit dizzy if I must and said it was just so I wanted to invite him and a few other members to a birthday party we were having for Di in a few weeks". Nobody ever called on it and what She said was true..the last part was. They were having a birthday party for Miss Di in a few weeks and She did want me to come but that wasn't the reason She asked for my email addresss. And that being said, the following are the emails that transpired starting when I got to work later that day. I have kept them all. As a matter of fact, I kept every single email, text message and even IM conversasions Miss Beth ever sent to me! LOL! This is how it all started (FYI...not all of this were via email. A lot of this was done through IM's as well so I pieced it together so that it reads best as one long conversasion) :

Miss Beth: "So what is the deal with you and my BFF Matt?"
Me: "What do you mean, Beth?"
Miss Beth: "You follow her around like a little poppy dog around the gym for months now. If your that interested, ask her out already."
Me: "But doesn't she have a boyfriend already?"
Miss Beth: "You mean Darren, the boy toy? Your man enough to beat out a boy toy aren't ya??
Me: "Yes".
Miss Beth: "Then asked her out already. It's damn obvious that you like her".
Me: "I do like Di a lot but the thing is I don't like her in romantic feelings; just as friends."
Miss Beth: "Really? So an absolute gorgeous, brillant (and Miss Di is brillant, has Her PHD), funny, smart, sweet, caring sexy young woman who was the prom queen (Miss Beth did not compete in those things senior year but was the Junior Homecoming Queen) is not your type?"
Me: "She is terrific Beth but again, I am just friends with her."
Miss Beth: "If I were too be bold, what is your problem then? Are you gay??"
Me: "LOL! No no no. Very not gay (not there is any wrong with that LOL!). It's just that I am interested in someone else".
Miss Beth: "Ohhh well now, that changes everything doesn't it? And you do not wish to be interested in anyone else outside of the person who like?"
Me: "That would be correct!" :)
Miss Beth: "How noble of you. Tell me does this woman know you like her?"
Me: "Truthfully I don't know. She might on her own but I have not told her".
Miss Beth: "Why not? How much do you like her?"
Me: "Quite a bit actually. I like her a lot actually".
Miss Beth: "Then how come you haven't asked her out yet?"

Me: "Several reasons Beth but mostly because she just had a break up with a guy and it ended very badly. I want to give some space first".
Miss Beth: "Again very noble of you. Well call her up and ask her out sometime! You seem like a descent enough fellow".

Me: "Can't don't have her phone number."
Miss Beth: "That is a problem isn't it? Have you spoken to her a lot?"Me: "Not a lot I would say but we have talked before."
Miss Beth: "Jesus Matt, does she know you even exist?"
Me: "LOL! Yes, she does."
Miss Beth: "Do I know her? Maybe I can help."
Me: "Oh you know her all-right."
Miss Beth: "How well? I don't know anyone then I know Di and you said it wasn't her".
Me: "You know her very well Beth".
Miss Beth: "Come now Matt, spill the beans. How well I know her?"
Me: "I don't want too. It's kind of embarrasing and personal".
Miss Beth: "If you really did not want to tell me, you wouldn't have brought it up now would ya?"
Me" I suppose not."
Miss Beth: "That wasn't so hard was it? You can tell me. I won't judge LOL!"
Me: "Honestly, you see her every morning when you get up and every night when you go to back to bed. Every time you look in a mirror and see that beautiful face of yours reflecting back". (I was busted so I went for broke).
Miss Beth: "Why Matthew are you stumbly trying to say it is me you are interested in?" (The first time She ever called me Matthew. It honestly gave me a tingle up my spine).
Me: "Yes. I like you Beth. There I admitted, LOL!
Miss Beth: "Well this has suddenly gotten interesting. When you were going to tell me?"
Me: "Soon. I just wanted to wait until time passed after the whole fisaco with Alex. I thought you needed your space. That and well, I wanted something else too."
Miss Beth: "Let me guess. Diana's approval right?"
Me: "How did you know?"
Miss Beth: "Di told me".
Me: Damn that girl! LOL! Did I at least get it?"
Miss Beth: "None of your business yet is it?"
Me: "Very true".
Miss Beth: "Well now Matt since you been exposed for liking me and if I may so, a bit smitten with me. What is you wish to do with me?"
Me: "Well I was hoping we can go out sometime."
Miss Beth: "As friends?"
Me: "To start off yes. I think that would be the easiest. We can go out as friends and see where it leads".
Miss Beth "Oh goody Matt, just what I need another friend. Is this your way of sweeping a lady off her feet?"
Me: "LOL not really".
Miss Beth: "And are your intentions really just to be friends with me "and see where it leads"?
Me: "No" (I was so embarrased at this point). Your not going to make this easy are you? LOL!"
Miss Beth: "Why should I?"
Me: "You shouldn't."
Miss Beth: "Alright then what are your intentions Matthew. Be specific this time, no bullshitting around here!"
Me: "Beth, I would very interested in taking you out on a date sometime in the very near future. I do not wish to be just friends with you. Far from it. I am quite fasinicated by you and yes, a bit smitten with you to say the least".
Miss Beth: "Good that is better. So you want to take me out on a date? Alright, when and what you were thinking?"
Me: What about this Friday night? I was thinking I could take you out to dinner and we could grab a drink afterwards so we can get to know each other better."
Miss Beth: "That sounds very nice Matthew. But no thank you".
Me: "Oh okay. You must have plans that evening?"
Miss Beth: "No I just don't want to see you then."
Me:  "What about Saturday night?"
Miss Beth: "I got plans that night sorry."
Me: "What are you doing Sunday then?"
Miss Beth: "Sunday is family day. I don't do first dates on family day".
Me: "Well, do you want to go out with me some other time?".
Miss Beth: "I'll think about it".


When She sent that to me, I thought it was over with and I had blown it. I honestly was depressed. I figure Miss Beth thought I was a complete putz. "I'll think about it" in my experience meant "No chance in hell and I just want to toy with you one last time". I spent the next day and a half almost beating myself up. I should have asked out sooner, I should told Her in person that I liked Her, I should have gotten Miss Diana's approval sooner etc. All these thoughts were raining down on me. I have a bit of hope if She was just busy for the weekend. But She was totally free on Friday night, "just did not wish to see me then". Talk about your ultimate rejection! I did not feel like eating, excerising or even going out. When I went to the gym during that time period, I avoided seeing Miss Beth and Miss Diana like the plague. I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die. I thought I played my cards so well but reality was telling me I totally fucked up. I was resigned to the fact She did not want to go out with me and it killed me. Then late on Thursday night, I received an email:

Miss Beth: "So I thought it over Matt and decided that I do wish to go on a date with you. I am free Saturday afternoon. You may take me out to lunch and then we can see what I want do from there". (Note how she was complete in control and said "we can see what I want to do from there" and not us? I was so essentic with Her saying yes on a date, I didn't even notice).
Me: "Fantastic! Where do you wish to go?"
Miss Beth: "Now Matthew, not only have you observed me with a keen eye these past few months but you also spent a ton of time talking with my best friend. You should know what type of resturants I like to eat at by now."
Me: "I do. I just want to make sure we go somewhere you really enjoy.
Miss Beth: "I'd guess your going have to hope you did a good job listening to Di when she talked about me and when you observed me".
Me: "I'd guess so. How should we do this? Should we meet at the gym or do you wish for me to pick you up. I can drive".
Miss Beth: "You can pick me up at my parents house. I will email you the address tomorrow. Pick me up at noon - SHARP!".
So the following day, Miss Beth email Her parents address and instructions on how to get there along with another nugget:
Miss Beth: "When you get there, just wait for me outside. Do not ring the door bell or knock. Nobody will be home outside of me so there is no reason too. Just make sure you are there at noon sharp and I will come out."
Me: "Got it, thanks! I am really forward to tomorrow."
Miss Beth: "As I am I....so far. :)


So now it was set. Our first date. I had a million things to decide and not a lot of time to do it in. I was literally jumping for joy and petrified at the same time. Where was I going to take Her? How should I dress?? How should I act??? Was this just a pity date??? After all, it was in the afternoon over "lunch". I really didn't know what to think of all of this. Ultimately, I tried to push my concerns behind and concentrate on the following fact: The Young Woman I was crazy about had agreed to go on a "date" with me and I was picking Her up tomorrow. I couldn't be happier....and more nervous at the same time.


Coming Up Next: "Our First Date"

A Bit About Miss Beth....

Miss Beth has many of you know, is several years younger then me. But She grew up similiar to me in many respects. She is from an middle/upper class family and is the youngest of four (two older brothers and a Sister). My wife had a very happy childhood. Her parents were very loving and She got along with Her sibilings. She was also excelled at almost anything She did at a young age. Academically, athletics, making friends, etc Miss Beth just was "great at it all" as Her older sister likes to point out. She was your typical Princess as well, as She often showered with a lot of gifts and affection from family as well as friends. But something was different about Her (just like me), even at a young age. Miss Beth will explain:

"I learned at a very young age that I was very powerful. I could not only get boys to do what I wanted them to do but have them thank me for it. I am sure they had a crush on me but I've now come to realize that it was deeper then that. Even at a young age, I could be cruel and humiliating when I had to be. I got into several school yard fights with boys and more then held my own. I don't know if it was growing up with two older brothers or what. When I got into middle school and junior high, I practiced with the boys wrestling team and pinned them quite regularly. The head coach was absolutely desperate to get me on the team but the school district had a policy of "no girls" on a boys team so I couldn't participate. I was angry about it and I used it as motivation to excel in other things".

And that is just what happened. Miss Beth excelled throughout junior high and high school. She was a varsity athlete by the time She reached Her Sophomore year of high school, competing in three different sports: Cheerleading, Gymnastics and Track. My Wife wound up helping Her school win two state championships both in cheerleading and gymnastics and top it off, She was an all-area track star. Obviously, my Wife was very popular in high school. Not only did She demand the attention of many boys who drool all over themselves for Her affection but also many girls who wished to be like Miss Beth. She handled it though by all accounts with grace and ease. She dated a few boys throughout the years but never too serious. My Wife also excelled at academics posting a 3.8 GPA, scored a 32 on Her ACT's and being an National Honors student. Miss Beth seemed to be your All-American Girl from the outside. But just like me, my Wife had secrets that She hide from others and/or wasn't aware fully of. For that I will let Her explain:




Judo. "I began taking Judo lessons when I was eleven years old. A neighbor of ours was an judo master. He and his wife would hold weekly lessons in their basement. I began attending and soon brought Di came along. We would hardly ever miss a lesson and wound up taking them for almost four years. We moved up a few belt classes and eventually joined a regular judo gym once we turned 16 and could drive ourselves. I reached the level of black belt a few years ago and now teach a few basic courses in judo at the gym I work at. I have also competed in some tournments and done very well and of course, sparring against boys/men.

Bodybuilding. "Throughout my life, I been a very athletic person. Yet I did not begin to workout with weights routinely until my sophomore year of high school. I was recovering from an injury sustained in a gymnastics competition therefore had to rehab it. I began lifting weights while the varisty football team did and I suprised them on how well I kept up. I went on a four a day week routine lifting weights for the rest of the year and summer. I came back to school with newly added muscle and confidence (if that were possible LOL!). It continued throughout my junior year and during my senior, I decided to make bodybuilding part of my life permanently. I decided to major in kinesiology (Miss Beth also has a double major in business) with the hopes of being a professional trainer and bodybuilder. I have competed in many amatuer bodybuilding competitions throughout the years and will continue to so through next year. Bodybuilding is a huge part of my life and regardless of my competing future, it will forever be."

Competing against boys. "My competition against boys when I was in high school only grew stronger. It seemed like so many boys wanted to test their "manhood" against me since I was such an accomplished athlete. Most of them were just looking for reasons to get a "cheap feel" therefore I ignore them. Quite frankly I was a different class athlete then they were and not worth my time. Yet, there were a few that really wanted to test my mantle that were worth the challenge. Therefore I accepted some in all kinds of forms. Arm wrestling in the cafeteria, leg wrestling at parties, wrestling/sparring in the wrestling room, strength and endurance competitions, etc. I did quite well at these challenges as I quite often defeated the little boy competitor. And not only did I love the challenge of competing against boys, but I absolutely loved how it made me feel. I loved seeing their defeated faces and shaking their heads in shame. It felt right, natural. Looking back on it now, I was doing something I was born to do.....only did not realize it at the time."

Using men. "The first time I ever used a man was during the summer before my senior year of high school. I was working as a camp counselor for a gymnastics camp. The person who managed the gymnastics portion of the gym was this creepy guy by the name of Eric. He would flirt with all the young girls even though most of us weren't 18 yet, let alone in college. Some of the girls were flattered by the attention he gave to us since he was supposed to be a "cute former Olympic hopeful". I thought he was a burnout who failed miserably and now was this 25-year old stuck working as a gym manager. So I never really paid attention to his passes at me even though as the summer went on, his passes only grew stronger. Eventually, I decided to throw it back in his face. One day, he was desperately trying to get me to "do something with him" as the two of us were in the large supply closest getting materials. I decided to have some fun with him. I told him that there was one thing I would be willing to do with him. "Give me 50 bucks," I said "and I will let you watch me shower naked. But you cannot touch me one bit". He shook his head in total astonishment and ask me to repeat. So I said it again....only this time slower and louder, "50 bucks Eric and I will let you watch me shower naked". Somewhere between his drool and exictment, I heard a yes. I told him to get the money first and show me. Then I will give instructions on when and where. It took the poor bastard about a week but eventually he did show me the money. I told him to bring it late Friday night to the women's shower room. It would be empty by then since the gym was closing and I would have just finished my workout therefore, I would need to shower anyway. I set up a chair for him and suprisely, he showed up on time with the money. I came out wearing a towel and instructed him to put the money on the ledge so I could see it. Eric did as he was told so I dropped my towel and began to run the water.

As Matt and others can attest too, I can be very narcissist therefore I was not the least embarrased being in front of a grown man naked. I had also had "shaved" the previous night for the event which I made sure Eric noticed. He was totally engrossed with me. Even more then he imagined I'd take it. I took my time showering, making sure I teased him to death. Halfway through, I noticed his cock buldging from his shorts. So I decided I wanted a bit more money....and further humiliate him in the process. "50 bucks more and I will let you jackoff in front of me." He didn't need me to say it twice this time. He immediately reach into his wallet and flash me another 50 dollars. I pointed to the ledge where the other 50 was and he put it down. He tried to sit down but I told him he had to jackoff on his knees or I'd would stop the water immediately and go dry off. Eric didn't fight me at all on it and went to his knees. He pulled out his package which to my suprise, was nicer then I imagined. I had expected him to have a small little winnie but his dick was relatively speaking competent. Eric really got into it which I had to laugh at. Moaning and groaning as he stroke his cock, his eyes eventually closed as he got close to his organism. I watched intentally has Eric blew his wad. I finished my shower, grabbed my towel, tied it around myself and walk over to him. I told him to not move a muscle. His shorts were at his ankles and he just gizzed all over the shower floor in front of him. I stood above him and before he could speak, I pushed him down on the floor, making his clothes wipe the cum off the floor. I then slam my foot into his back and barked at him saying that if he ever told a soul, I would fucking kick his ass in front of everyone. He agreed and begged for me to take my foot off of him which I was kniving into him. I waited a few moments as I basked in my glory before walking out. We wound up doing that twice more before the summer was up. Three showers for three hundred dollars. And the only time he ever touch me was when he shook my hand thanking me for being a great "summer worker" the Friday before school began. Looking back, it was a great introduction on how my Goddess statue could work to get me stuff. I was young and naive so I could gotten more from him for perhaps less. But I was learning fast. And again, I was loving it. Watching him jagoff and cum while on his knees on the floor like a monkey honestly turned me on. Not him so much but rather, the power I had over him."

Sugar Daddies: "The Eric experience was a springboard to begin using sugar daddies. I had a few my senior year. I had remain friends with an older cheerleaders, Rebecca so she introduce myself and Di (My Wife brings Di in on everything always!) to some "gentlemen". They were successful middle aged men who just wanted a young little thing around to adore and drool over. They bought me and Di clothes, gift cards, cash, showed us around town where we went to elegant dinners, parties, plays, etc. In return, we just paid attention to whatever they wanted to talk about (which was often their unfilling personal life) and showed us off to their friends. I would hold their hands and cuddle with them if I thought it was warranted. And on one occassion, I did make with an younger handsome gentleman who was in town on business but that because I really wanted too. And it never went past that. I never gave them the Eric shower treatment though I could have made a fortune off of it! We only saw these gentleman callers a few times a month. On top of everything else I had going on, I did have a boyfriend who knew nothing of it but more importantly, I wanted to enjoy my senior year. Again, it was a good training ground on how to get men to bend to your will. The power that I felt after being adored and giving nothing in return was addicting. Plus the gifts and cash looked lovely stacked and stashed in my back closet which my parents never checked. (Beth smiled broadly at the memory of that).

Exploring Women. "As I got older, I realized I was attracted to women just like I was to men. I began exploring these feelings with the person I trusted the most, Diana. We often cuddle when we were in junior high whenever we had a sleepover and around 8th grade, we began to makeout for "practice". But in high school, we began to go further then that. We began exploring our bodies and realized we enjoy each other's company on a physical level that neither of one of us expected. We began to have sex on a regular basis by the time we were 17.We were bold too as we often hop into a bathroom stall at school after one of athletic practices and while crashing a frat party during a college visit, we lock ourselves in the bedroom of this idiot who hit on Di all night and didn't come out until the next morning.....completely spent after pushing each other's bodies. There were a few other girls that I wanted to explore my sexual nature with, mostly on the gymnastics team but Di and I decided that be best to wait until we were in college and knew what ladies were bi-curious. And we also agreed, that we wouldn't tell any men about how bi-sexual natural until we were in a "truly committed relationship".

Miss Beth would go on and graduate from high school with honors. She then next went to a very prestigious college where, my Wife once again excelled. Miss Beth was a great college athlete competing both in cheerleading and gymnsatics. She also joined a sorority, the school newspaper as a freelancing photographer and yet still managed to post a near perfect GPA. She roomed with Di all four years and dated a few guys, most notably a pre-med student by the name of Bobby, who She dated for a few years and had a very serious relationship with. Her family life continued to be strong as She stayed close with Her parents and siblings even though they were starting their own adult lives by getting married/starting families. She continued with both Her bodybuilding and judo careers, competing in both sports and doing well. My Wife meant even more friends (and more admirers) during this time, again giving everyone around Her the feeling of the perfect "American Co-Ed". Yet again, there something going on behind the scenes that others were not aware of:



Professional Dominatrix. "Before I became a professional dominatrix, I was behaving like a lifestyle dominatrix. I had a couple boys on a string that I used for chores and other necessities. Di and I always had the cleanest apartment, cars, clothes, homework slaves, etc. They also showered us with gifts. In return, I let them worship my feet, my boots and if they were very good, they could worship my body a bit. But mostly, they did it to be in my Goddess presence. About halfway through college, I was introduced to a professional dominatrix by the name of Lady Stephanie. Over the course of a few weeks, we meant over coffee and she recruited me to join her dungeon. I was hestiant at first and for me, that is very unexpected since I am not a hestiant person. I had no doubt that I could do the job. And the money she said I could make for such small work sounded very appealing. Stephanie also insured my privacy by saying I would not be used in any advertisement or marketing of the dungeon. My client list would be strictly be built on a referral basis where I had the ultimate right to see or decline a possible submissive. But would I'd enjoy it? That was my main concern. I had enjoyed my time using Eric's pathetic nature against him, beating up boys who challenge me and of course, our little apartment slaves were great but to get this involved and sexual with a submissive man? I had my doubts. Still, I decided to press on so between our meetings, I read up on the subject of S&M. It intrigue me more then I expected so Stephanie set up for me to watch a session. I had watch a lot of S&M porn during this time but nothing prepared me to walk into the studio room and take a seat (along with several others). They dimmed the lights so the submissive slave could not make out our faces. The session began and within a mere moments, I was hooked. I was very turn on to be explicit, very turn on. I absolutely loved the power exchange, the control the woman had over her man and how he responded to the pain she administer to him. After the session, I waited around to speak with Stephanie. I told her I was in. She said she could not be happier and would be personally seeing over my training. (Similiar to Miss Jessica, Miss Beth's training last an entire summer. She had the benefit of though of being two years older and having of course, Miss Diana join Her on the journey as well).  By the time my junior year rolled around, I was ready. Stephanie set me up with one of her oldest clients. I followed my training exactly, going over all ground rules, interest, limits and expectations before we meet via emails and asking for a deposit. We had a two hour session and by the time it was over with, he was puddy in my hands. I also was drunk with power and though I didn't know it at the time, I had found my true inner Goddess though I would not truly follow until a dramastic incident a few years later. (More on this in a later post) I became one of the most popular dominatrixes at the dungeon and was always getting showered with gifts, flowers, money, letters of admoration and devotion and this was outside of my session fees. I meant some great friends, most notably the other women at the dungeon and I began to explore the S&M underground".



Diana and I on a side note became of even more value to the studio since we were able to train the other dominatrixes in wrestling skills that was becoming all the rage (and still is) throughout the S&M world therefore the other dominatrixes could offer wrestling/fighting as part of their requests. There was nothing better then beating a man down and then dominating them culiminating ass. I also could be a vicious tease and denier but I am sure you can figure that out by now". (Again, Miss Beth has a wicked smile on Her face).



More Exploring Women (and Diana more): "My bi-sexual tendancies did not grow once they got to college, they only grew stronger. Both Di and I branch out and explore our bodies with  other women including a couple of the ladies at the studio dungeon and the S&M underground. We really had some unforgettable nights. Exploring my sexuality with women became a vital part of my life at this time and it is something that will always be."

"Diana and I also grew closer, if that were possible. We roomed not only room all four years together but also when we were on the road together for athetlic competitions, pledged the same sorority and even vacationed together. Close to our senior year, we spent a lot of time talking about having a romantic relationship and begin dating. We both gave it a lot of thought but ultimately decided against it. I really don't know why we never tried it, we were such a perfect match! Perhaps it was a combination of both of us knowing deep down we wanted to be with a man in the end and the fact we never wanted to ruin our friendship. She will always be my best friend forever,  my other soul mate and if I were to ever be in a committed relationship with a woman, Diana is the only one for me".

College grew to a close for Miss Beth and in many ways She was on top of the world. My Wife graduated with honors and had Her choice of jobs leaving school. She took a personal trainer's position at a prestiaged gym which no considence, Miss Diana was working at part-time to help pay for Her upcoming grad school. And as fate would have it, a single architectual consultant who was secretly a submissive to Women was a member and workout there regularly! LOL! My Wife truly had it all, even a secret professional Dominatrix career that was helping to create in my opinion, the perfect loving Mistress Wife.  Everything was perfect for Miss Beth, except the gentleman She was dating.

"I had broken up with Bobby not too long after senior year started. We had a great relationship at first but over time, we just grew apart. He was a great guy and I was sad when we stopped seeing each other. I can say that he is the only man outside of my husband that I truly loved. I took a few months off being single before I was introduced to Alex. He was several years older then me. Alex was good looking, smart, successful and could be charming. He also took his time courting me which I appreciated due to my pretty recent breakup with Bobby. On paper, he was a man any woman would want. It seemed like the perfect time to find someone like him since I was just finishing school."




"Yet from the very set, I could tell something was wrong. I don't know what it was but I could tell he wasn't for me. I could not be open with him and more importantly, our relationship was extremely vanilla. Even more vanilla then my previous ones which as I explored the S&M world more, was something I did not enjoy. Alex would even try to be  a bit domineering towards me which I would not put up with. And yet, I pressed on with a relationship with him for months. Looking back on it, it was one of the biggest mistakes of my life except how it ended which became a life altering moment. As Di always told me, "You weren't yourself with Alex and it shined through". He honestly began to annoy me after awhile but for one of the few times in my life, I'd acted like a stupid little girl. I'd stayed with him hoping it change. It never did obviously. Things did started to change though drastically though I started my new job out of college. Not with Alex but rather the moment I meet my future husband and soul mate.


Meeting Matt (Me, LOL) for the first time: "Wow, that was a moment I will never forget it! My first impression of him was that he was devilishly handsome, beautiful really. I should point out that I did not go up to everyone and shake their hand like Matt suggested in an earlier post. Did I introduce myself to members and talk with them a bit? Yes but I did not flirt with them or even shake their hand. Only Matt's. And shaking his hand was honestly magical. I felt a tingle up my body that I had not felt in a long long time. And I was dating someone at the time. I remember as we talked, I checked out his body which I found to be in a word yummy. He had strong muscles and each bodypart was well defined. Matt was confident but did not show it in a cocky matter. He wore a t-shirt with sleeves and shorts that were the correct size. I absolutely hate guys who were shorts that look like they are trying to smuggle bananas! (LOL!) Plus, they matched which showed me that he put effort into himself even at the gym. I remember looking into his beautiful eyes as we talked and his delicious mouth that had a goregous smile. I also noticed that unlike the other 99% of the men at the gym, he wasn't checking out my body but rather looking into my eyes as we talked. And he was listening intentially to what I had to say. I'd liked that a lot. It showed me that he was a respectful man. I could stood there for a lot longer and talked with him (Ditto for me obviously as I have mentioned) and was quite pissed off with Diana when she came up and broke it up even though she was just letting me know my next appointment was ready. I tried blocking Matt out of my mind after that and concentrate on the rest of my day. It was difficult though. And while having lunch in the trainer's office, my mind drifted. I will never forget what Diana said to me when she came in." (Note they both have told me exactly how this conversasion went):

Miss Diana: "Boy, was that Matt guy was something. You two would make a good couple".
Miss Beth: "More like you and him. I already have a boyfriend Di, you know that".
Miss Diana: "Who is putting your feet asleep. Don't deny it."
Miss Beth: "We are just taking our time to get to know each other. I am very happy with Alex".
Miss Diana:"*Laughs* Riiigghhhttt. Okay, we can pretend that to be true. Just like I can pretend that you haven't been staring at that duck tape roll this entire time and thinking of Matt".

"I looked up and realize I had been busted. There was a roll of duck tape on my desk and for the entire time I had been there eating, even before Diana came in; I had been daydreaming about Matt and what I wanted to do with him. Everything from gagging his mouth over with it to tying him up by both the hands and feet so he could endure some pain and pleasure by me. But most of all, I wanted to make him all mine by completely humping the crap out of him. And the craziest thing about it all? I'd hadn't once fantasized let alone tried anything like that with Alex. Yet, here I was. I found myself very arroused by the prospect. Extremely as a matter of fact; perhaps more then anytime in my life. I'd honestly had no answer for Di because what she said was true. I'd looked up at her and started giggling while blushing a bit (And I can tell you, Miss Beth hardly ever blushes!).


"She left and I sat there trying not to think about it anymore. But I found it hard not too. It felt so natural, so right. But I was being stubborn and not a good way. I still wanted to play it out with Alex. Like I said previously, the relationship with Alex was one of the biggest mistakes my life, maybe the biggest. But the resolution and outcome of that relationship was life changing and without it, I doubt Matt and I would ever started dating. Certainly not in the way we currently now which is absolutely perfect. So I was left pondering what was my reality was (Alex) and what I deep down really wanted (an D&S relationship one with Matt). It was a dark time of my life and honestly, would get much darker in a matter of only a few short weeks. Fortunately what they say is true. Total darkness can only bring the light. And my light was coming, brighter and better then I could ever imagine. I just needed to hit it into action".